Beyond the Facade with Choose Recovery Services cover art

Beyond the Facade with Choose Recovery Services

Beyond the Facade with Choose Recovery Services

By: Luke Gordon with Choose Recovery Services
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Beyond the Facade explores authenticity, healing, and recovery from betrayal trauma, sexual addiction, and infidelity. Host Luke Gordon, cofounder of Choose Recovery Services, and his guests share tools for addiction recovery, relationship repair, and emotional healing. Learn to rebuild trust, live with integrity, and create authentic connections as you heal from pain and go Beyond the Facade.Luke Gordon with Choose Recovery Services Relationships Social Sciences
Episodes
  • 100: Making Sense of His Behavior

    100: Making Sense of His Behavior
    Jun 11 2026
    What happens when the acting out stops—but everything still feels broken?This week Luke and Scott Blundo (fellow Choose Recovery Services coach) explore the difference between sobriety and recovery.Many betrayed partners expect life to improve once the behaviors stop. But recovery is far more than just abstinence. You'll learn:Why sobriety and recovery are not the same thingWhy emotions often intensify after acting out stopsThe four key markers of genuine recoveryHow accountability differs from shame and punishmentWhat betrayed partners can realistically expect during healingInterested in learning more? Register for the Making Sense of His Behavior group starting soon at Choose Recovery Services.Chapters01:39 Meet Scott04:20 Making Sense of His Behavior Course07:11 Sobriety vs Recovery09:54 When Things Get Worse16:54 Markers of Change25:04 Accountability32:34 Setbacks and ProgressWatch the episode on YouTube ⁠HERERegister Now!***Use code PODCAST150 to get $150 off any Choose intensive or retreat in 2026!***Courage to Thrive - Join us for this healing retreat for women who have experienced betrayal trauma. It offers a safe, supportive space to process pain, reconnect with yourself, and begin moving forward with strength and hope. Through guided workshops, therapeutic support, and restorative experiences, women leave feeling seen, empowered, and less alone. August 25-28, 2026 in Spanish Fork, Utah. Reclaimed: A Men’s Parts-Work Intensive - A transformative 4-day intensive for men in recovery from problematic sexual behaviors, using the Internal Family Systems model to help participants deepen emotional healing, reduce shame, understand their inner world, and live with greater authenticity and wholeness. August 18-21 in Spanish Fork, UT.💵We don’t want finances to get in the way of your healing. Scholarships and payment plans (including buy now, pay later options) are available for all of our intensives. NEW GroupsMaking Sense of His Behavior - NEW group designed for anyone who is trying to make sense of confusing, painful, and hurtful behaviors in their relationship. Know Your Story is a group for men who are ready to move beyond surface-level recovery and explore the experiences, beliefs, and patterns that have shaped their lives through guided writing exercises, reflection, and group discussion. Group starts June 22nd and runs for 14 weeks.Get our FREE eBook - Healing From Betrayal Trauma: A Compassionate Guide to Reclaiming Your LifeConnect With Us:Learn more about Luke here. Schedule a complimentary consultation here.Don’t miss an episode! Join our email list and get notified when new episodes air! Follow us on Instagram @choose_recovery_services Wanting more? Choose Recovery Services offers many courses specifically for men:Beyond the Facade: Men’s Healing Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with others, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deeper sense of self respect.Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services:Intensives - Accelerate your healing journey with one of our intensives, available year-round for individuals, couples, and professionals. Road to Recovery Webinar - Join us on the second Sunday of each month for a FREE interactive discussion that explores tools and strategies to support individuals and couples navigating the challenges of recovery following betrayal. Choose To Be Podcast - This podcast focuses on helping women heal from infidelity and betrayal trauma.Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. Learn more and register for courses at chooserecoveryservices.com
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    39 mins
  • 99: How to Spot an Emotionally Shut-Down Man Part 2

    99: How to Spot an Emotionally Shut-Down Man Part 2
    Jun 4 2026
    Why does an emotionally shut down man struggle to change—even when he genuinely wants to?In this follow-up episode, Luke and Alana respond to listener questions about emotional shutdown, nervous system healing, and what recovery actually looks like for men who have spent years disconnecting from their emotions.***Listen to Part 1 HERE.***Together they explore:Why insight alone doesn't create changeWhat emotional shutdown is really protectingHow attachment wounds shape adult relationshipsWhy some men become more emotional after starting recoveryWhat somatic work actually isHow nervous system healing creates lasting transformationWhat emotional reconnection looks like in real lifeChapters01:45 Why Insight Isn’t Enough08:01 What Shutdown Protects12:12 Control and Safety16:17 Predictability Over Vulnerability20:05 Reconnecting Emotionally28:43 Somatic Work Explained30:04 Healing Takes TimeWatch the episode on YouTube ⁠HERERegister Now!***Use code PODCAST150 to get $150 off any Choose intensive or retreat in 2026!***🌴NEW: Couples Retreat in Costa Rica! - If you are in a stable place in your relationship and want to reconnect, regulate, and rediscover each other, we invite you to our couples breathwork retreat. Retreat is July 30-August 3.Courage to Thrive - Join us for this healing retreat for women who have experienced betrayal trauma. It offers a safe, supportive space to process pain, reconnect with yourself, and begin moving forward with strength and hope. Through guided workshops, therapeutic support, and restorative experiences, women leave feeling seen, empowered, and less alone. August 25-28, 2026 in Spanish Fork, Utah. 💵We don’t want finances to get in the way of your healing. Scholarships and payment plans (including buy now, pay later options) are available for all of our intensives. Making Sense of His Behavior - NEW group designed for anyone who is trying to make sense of confusing, painful, and hurtful behaviors in their relationship. Know Your Story is a group for men who are ready to move beyond surface-level recovery and explore the experiences, beliefs, and patterns that have shaped their lives. Through guided writing exercises, reflection, and group discussion, participants create a personal narrative that helps them uncover the roots of shame, self-protection, and unhealthy behaviors. Group starts June 22nd and runs for 14 weeks.Get our FREE eBook - Healing From Betrayal Trauma: A Compassionate Guide to Reclaiming Your LifeConnect With Us:Learn more about Luke here. Schedule a complimentary consultation here.Don’t miss an episode! Join our email list and get notified when new episodes air! Follow us on Instagram @choose_recovery_services Wanting more? Choose Recovery Services offers many courses specifically for men:Beyond the Facade: Men’s Healing Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with others, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deeper sense of self respect.Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services:Intensives - Accelerate your healing journey with one of our intensives, available year-round for individuals, couples, and professionals. Road to Recovery Webinar - Join us on the second Sunday of each month for a FREE interactive discussion that explores tools and strategies to support individuals and couples navigating the challenges of recovery following betrayal. Choose To Be Podcast - This podcast focuses on helping women heal from infidelity and betrayal trauma.Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. Learn more and register for courses at chooserecoveryservices.com
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    35 mins
  • 98: Are All CSAT Therapists the Same? What Actually Matters in Addiction Recovery - with Jacob Fletcher

    98: Are All CSAT Therapists the Same? What Actually Matters in Addiction Recovery - with Jacob Fletcher
    May 28 2026
    What actually makes a good CSAT therapist?In this episode, Luke Gordon and Jacob Fletcher (CSAT and fellow Choose Recovery Services coach), unpack the major differences between recovery approaches in pornography addiction and compulsive sexual behavior treatment.Many people spend years in recovery focused only on behavior and sobriety — yet still feel emotionally disconnected, ashamed, and unable to build intimacy.This conversation explores:Behavior-focused vs trauma-focused therapyWhy emotional regulation mattersThe role of attachment wounds and shameHow relapse should actually be approachedQuestions to ask when choosing a therapistIf you’ve struggled to feel real transformation in recovery, this episode may help you understand why.Chapters02:04 Meet Jacob Fletcher04:27 Different CSAT Styles07:31 Behavior vs Somatic09:44 Questions to Ask14:32 Relapse Approach18:29 Dopamine Reset21:46 Balancing Both ModelsWatch the episode on YouTube ⁠HERERegister Now!***Use code PODCAST150 to get $150 off any Choose intensive or retreat in 2026!***🌴NEW: Couples Retreat in Costa Rica! - If you are in a stable place in your relationship and want to reconnect, regulate, and rediscover each other, we invite you to our couples breathwork retreat. Register by May 31st to get our early-bird pricing - $600 OFF!Courage to Thrive - Join us for this healing retreat for women who have experienced betrayal trauma. It offers a safe, supportive space to process pain, reconnect with yourself, and begin moving forward with strength and hope. Through guided workshops, therapeutic support, and restorative experiences, women leave feeling seen, empowered, and less alone. August 25-28, 2026 in Spanish Fork, Utah. Making Sense of His Behavior - NEW 8-week group designed for anyone who is trying to make sense of confusing, painful, and hurtful behaviors in their relationship. Start the group at any time and stay for eight weeks.Get our FREE eBook - Healing From Betrayal Trauma: A Compassionate Guide to Reclaiming Your Life💵We don’t want finances to get in the way of your healing. Scholarships and payment plans (including buy now, pay later options) are available for all of our intensives. Connect With Us:Learn more about Luke here. Schedule a complimentary consultation here.Don’t miss an episode! Join our email list and get notified when new episodes air! Follow us on Instagram @choose_recovery_services Wanting more? Choose Recovery Services offers many courses specifically for men:Beyond the Facade: Men’s Healing Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with others, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deeper sense of self respect.Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services:Intensives - Accelerate your healing journey with one of our intensives, available year-round for individuals, couples, and professionals. Our intensives foster connection with others who share similar experiences, creating an immersive environment that enables profound transformation in a short period of time.Road to Recovery Webinar - Join us on the second Sunday of each month for a FREE interactive discussion that explores tools and strategies to support individuals and couples navigating the challenges of recovery following betrayal. Choose To Be Podcast - This podcast focuses on helping women heal from infidelity and betrayal trauma.Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. Learn more and register for courses at chooserecoveryservices.com
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    29 mins
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