Want to give up drinking but have no idea where to start?

You're in the right place!

Everyone tells you sobriety starts on day one. It doesn't. It actually starts before that, in the boring, unglamorous groundwork nobody really talks about. The stuff that happens quietly in the weeks before you ever have a proper "sober day."

In this episode, I sit down with Jean McCarthy to talk about that exact groundwork, starting with the big one: choosing your why. It sounds simple. It isn't. Because a why like "I'm doing this for the kids," as noble and understandable as it sounds, can actually be one of the shakiest foundations you can build a sobriety on. It's a why that lives outside you, and when things get hard (and they will), a why that isn't fully your own can be the first thing to crack.

We talk about what a sturdier why can look like instead, and the small, practical, almost boring shifts that quietly build a foundation strong enough to hold you when the cravings hit. Things like rearranging your furniture so the sofa doesn't automatically mean "wine o'clock." Creating yourself a proper sober nook, somewhere in the house that's just yours, with nothing to do with a bottle. Taking the wine glasses out of the house completely, so the decision isn't sitting there waiting to be made every single evening. And maybe the hardest shift of all, starting to like yourself again before you feel like you've "earned" it.

Jean also gets really honest about her own fears going into this. Including the very real, very human worry that her husband might not want a sober wife. She talks about the moment that fear finally lifted, when she realised that a sober wife is so much better than a dead wife, because if she's honest, that's genuinely the direction things were heading.

Oh, and they talk about how their mutual stumpy fingers actually represent their drinking stories quite well!!!

So, get comfy and let's get prepared for sober life.

Note - We chatted for way too long, so this is Part 1. (Part 2 in-coming with loads more juicy prep tips)

💛 Resources & Links

Follow and Find out more about Jean head to @jeanmccarthy_writes

Or buy her book UnPickled Prepare to be Alcohol-Free: Insights and Tips to Ease the Transition - here

https://amzn.asia/d/02iVCTtz

📘 Victoria’s memoir – A Thousand Wasted Sundays

A brutally honest and hilarious look at motherhood, anxiety, and ditching the booze.

👉 https://amzn.asia/d/0aZ69GpK

Vic's book 'Mumming - A year of Trying (and Failing) to be a better parent - https://amzn.asia/d/0bUJTS2W

🎧 Listen to more Sober Awkward episodes

👉 www.soberawkward.com

🫖 Join The Cuppa Community

Our private, supportive online space for sober folk

👉 www.cuppa.community

📘 Get the Sober Awkward Guide

Our downloadable toolkit for ditching booze the awkward way.

👉 The Sober Awkward Guide

📱 Follow us for daily sober fun:

Instagram: @soberawkward

TikTok: @soberawkward

Facebook: Sober Awkward Community for Women

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Share Shed – Sober Awkward Writing Competition Specials - Bodies Change - By Erin

Every Thursday, we’re handing the story telling over to you.

Over the next few months, Vic will be reading some of the incredible entries from this year’s Sober Awkward Writing Competition. Honest, funny, heartbreaking, hopeful, awkward and beautifully human, these stories come from people all over the world who have experienced the ups and downs of changing their relationship with alcohol.

Whether you’re sober curious, newly alcohol-free, years into recovery, or simply wondering if life might feel better without booze, we hope these stories remind you that you’re not alone.

Writing has a powerful way of helping us make sense of our lives. It can shine a light on things we’ve hidden away, help us process difficult experiences, and remind us just how resilient we really are. Plus, it’s considerably cheaper than therapy and doesn’t require you to wear pants.

So grab a cuppa, get comfortable, and join us for this week’s Share Shed as Vic tells another story from our amazing community.

💛 Resources & Links

📘 Victoria’s memoir – A Thousand Wasted Sundays

A brutally honest and hilarious look at motherhood, anxiety, and ditching the booze.

👉 Buy the book here or head to the website to find out more about writing mentorships with Vic.

👉 www.soberawkward.com

🫖 Join The Cuppa Community

Our private, supportive online space for sober folk

👉 www.cuppa.community

📘 Get the Sober Awkward Guide

Our downloadable toolkit for ditching booze the awkward way.

👉 The Sober Awkward Guide

📱 Follow us for daily sober fun:

Instagram: @soberawkward

TikTok: @soberawkward

Facebook: Sober Awkward Community for Women

📞 SUPPORT & RESOURCES

If anything in today’s episode felt familiar, or you’re worried about your drinking, there is support available. You don’t have to do this alone.

🇦🇺 Australia

National Alcohol & Other Drug Hotline

📞 1800 250 015 (24/7)

https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/alcohol-and-drug-information-service

Lifeline

📞 13 11 14 (24/7)

https://www.lifeline.org.au

Hello Sunday Morning / Daybreak

https://hellosundaymorning.org

https://daybreakapp.com.au

Clean Slate Clinic

https://www.cleanslateclinic.com

🇬🇧 United Kingdom

Drinkline

📞 0300 123 1110

https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/alcohol-advice/alcohol-support/

Alcohol Change UK

https://alcoholchange.org.uk

We Are With You

https://www.wearewithyou.org.uk

🌍 International

Alcoholics Anonymous

https://www.aa.org

SMART Recovery

https://www.smartrecovery.org

💬 A Gentle Reminder

If you’re drinking in the morning to cope, especially with anxiety or withdrawal symptoms, it’s important to speak to a doctor or medical professional. Stopping alcohol suddenly can be unsafe for some people, and getting support can make a huge difference.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For many LGBTQ+ people, the pub wasn’t just somewhere to grab a drink—it was one of the few places where they could safely be themselves. For decades, bars and clubs became places of acceptance, community and belonging. But when alcohol becomes woven into your identity and social life, what happens when you decide to stop drinking?

For many people, giving up alcohol means changing what they drink. For many LGBTQ+ people, it can also mean changing where they belong.

This week, Victoria sits down with Karl Considine, public speaker, advocate and Ambassador for Alcohol Change UK. Karl has become one of the leading voices in the UK’s alcohol-free movement, using honesty, humour and lived experience to challenge old ideas about sobriety. Karl is helping a new generation build confidence, connection, and identity without alcohol. Through his work, he has helped show that a life without alcohol isn’t about missing out—it’s about creating more connection, joy and possibility.

Together, they explore the powerful relationship between booze and queer culture. They discuss why LGBTQ+ communities experience higher rates of alcohol and substance misuse than the general population, the role discrimination and minority stress can play, and why creating alcohol-free spaces has never been more important.

It’s an honest conversation about identity, connection, loneliness, community and what it means to build a life where you don’t need alcohol to feel like you belong. Whether you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community or simply curious about why our relationship with alcohol is shaped by so much more than willpower, this episode is full of compassion, insight and plenty of laughs along the way.

💛 Resources & Links

Follow and Find out more about Karl head to @karlconsidine

📘 Victoria’s memoir – A Thousand Wasted Sundays

A brutally honest and hilarious look at motherhood, anxiety, and ditching the booze.

👉 https://amzn.asia/d/0aZ69GpK

Vic's book 'Mumming - A year of Trying (and Failing) to be a better parent - https://amzn.asia/d/0bUJTS2W

🎧 Listen to more Sober Awkward episodes

👉 www.soberawkward.com

🫖 Join The Cuppa Community

Our private, supportive online space for sober folk

👉 www.cuppa.community

📘 Get the Sober Awkward Guide

Our downloadable toolkit for ditching booze the awkward way.

👉 The Sober Awkward Guide

📱 Follow us for daily sober fun:

Instagram: @soberawkward

TikTok: @soberawkward

Facebook: Sober Awkward Community for Women

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.