Episodes

  • The VAR-monitor jog & fans coming in peace: The listeners' loves & hates
    May 27 2026
    Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the exact gait of a referee going over to check the VAR monitor, a tiny element of Baddiel & Skinner's Three Lions you have probably never noticed, the epidemic of fans "coming in peace" to rival club forums and the exact criteria for a player to be said to be “jumping ship”. Play the new Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    52 mins
  • Spurs circling the drain, European hangover defiance & farmers taking penalties
    May 25 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: whether West Ham sleepwalked to relegation and if Spurs are now officially "circling the drain", Villa defying their European hangover, forensics are called in on Bruno Fernandes' assists record, Glenn Murray with an unexpected demonym, farmers taking penalties against Chris Kirkland, and a Premier League farewell from Keys & Gray after 34 years. Play the Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    51 mins
  • Unleash the Arsenal long-reads, Spygate super-schadenfreude & a Bundesliga hoax
    May 20 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: cutting through the considerable noise of Arsenal's long-awaited Premier League title and the 12-day express saga of Spygate, the Australian Andy Gray, Rory Stewart apparently hearing about VAR for the first time, the one interesting name from the BBC and ITV’s World Cup punditry lineups, eminent anthropologists with Peter Drury’s voice and a suspiciously made-up-looking Bundesliga club. Play the Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    46 mins
  • Labour's laboured footballspeak, thumpable scorelines & penalty pop-ups
    May 18 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: an FA Cup final that will live short in the memory, a confident prediction of West Ham's short-term future, some 4/10 football chat from politicians, serviceable Premier League back-up strikers' names in ski equipment, Adam Wharton’s unexpected backflip, some classic early news of England's World Cup camp, and a roving Richard Keys in London. Meanwhile, the panel indulge in a brief history of the between-the-legs flicked finish in English football. Play the Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Download SAILY in your app store and use code CLICHES at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For more info, visit https://saily.com/cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    57 mins
  • The Football Cliches Quiz XXIV: Cliches vs The Sweeper - The Rematch
    May 13 2026
    The 24th edition of the Football Clichés Quiz sees Adam, Charlie and Dave take on globe-trotting world football storytellers The Sweeper for the second time. The questions include: Argentine footballspeak, obscure ball suppliers, made-up football podcasts, World Cup coastlines, transport-themed top-flight outfits, fake Brazilian internationals and much more. Play the new Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN You can listen to The Sweeper here: https://linktr.ee/SweeperPod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 48 mins
  • Corner-kick chaos, a Premier League without a W & Joe Cole at the Ritz
    May 11 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the slightly overlooked aspects of the West Ham corner chaos, predicting the title of the Arsenal story-of-the-season book, an alphabetical crisis for the Premier League, five-star co-commentary from Joe Cole, how long is too long for a commentator to stay silent after a goal, and footballers’ names in both cheap office furniture and the inexplicably Urdu songs of Robert Palmer. Play the Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Download SAILY in your app store and use code CLICHES at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For more info, visit https://saily.com/cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    52 mins
  • The 9.75 role, Tom Hiddleston's Champions League mindset & the Faroese Andy Gray
    May 7 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a cultural review of the Champions League semi-finals (featuring Daniel Sturridge inventing the "nine and three-quarters" role and the return of CBS's Beckham & Friends), celebration policing ties itself in knots, the Andy Gray of the Faroe Islands, former Wimbledon strikers' names in mid-1960s Marvel comics and a curious Evening With Eden Hazard (feat. Rickie Lambert). Meanwhile, the panel ponder the name and vibe of a hypothetical new fourth UEFA club competition. Play the Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    47 mins
  • The fixture pile-up threshold, Sean Dyche playing "Sean Dyche" & under-10s trophy parades
    May 5 2026
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: the trickiest title-race-classification task so far, legendary Premier League goalkeepers in petty criminals’ middle names, Sean Dyche's Instagram unveiling, Tim Sherwood on modern football and some awkward football phone-in moments with Chris Sutton. Meanwhile, the panel anticipate Tom Hiddlestone's Champions League punditry and debate how many games constitute a "fixture pile-up". Play the new Happy Hunting Grounds daily quiz at games.footballcliches.com Sign up for Dreamland, the members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    50 mins